Unconditional. Entry for September 05, 2007

Clown #1

-How many more?
-What do you mean?
-How many words will you teach me?
-Enough.
-Enough for what?
-Enough for you to LIVE.
-I am living.
-You are. But there are some words missing in your vocabulary.You will LIVE.
-Words? Vocabulary? Are we talking about grammar or my life here?
-You know what I mean.
-I do... And that's the funniest thing... People always think I know what they mean. But sometimes words need to be said properly.
-What about you? You want the same thing from people, don't you? You always want them to know what you mean, what you are feeling, what you are thinking about without saying it.
-Yes. You are right. But still...
...
...
-Unconditional... That word never meant anything to me. I mean I know the dictionary definition of it. It goes like this:
1) without conditions or limitations; total 2) mathematics (of an equality) true for all values of the variable.
But I never understood it. I mean I never felt it... Until Yesterday.
...
...
-But why?..
-Don't even ask. You know, that the answer is irrelevant now. It just IS like this. You can accept it or you can just deny the truth, which will make you feel not very good I guess.
-What about the third option? Fight?
-Fight? With who? With what? What war are you fighting?
-My war. My life. My...
-I know all that. But you know what I will say, don't you?
-Stop playing my thoughts.
-I'm not. I AM your thoughts. It's not a game for me. It's my life.
-I know...
...
...
"The greatest enemy will hide in the last place you would ever look."

Julius Caesar. 75 BC.

"There is no avoiding war, it can only be postponed to the advantage of your enemy."

Niccolo Machiavelli. 1502



-If I am your enemy, than who's your friend?
-I don't know. All of you are I guess. All 13. But you are all my enemies.
-You don't seem to know what you're talking about.
...
...
-Unconditional.

Without conditions, without limitations, without excuses. Pure. Even when it pains you so much you think you can not bare anymore, the very moment you realize, that it's not about you... I always thought I was selfish... Apparently not selfish enough... When you realize, that instead of being mad, instead of thinking about yourself, all you are thinking about is being there.

Fuck the cheap talk.

The only thing that matters after all is Love.
Unconditional.


[cyb]
05.09.2007
15:50